When Things Go Wrong...And They Sometimes Will

Something happened at my house today. I can't tell you what it was exactly...because I'm embarrassed and ashamed. Suffice it to say it involved a momentary lapse in mommy memory that jeopardized one of my children's safety. I am happy to report all of my children are safe and healthy as I write this.

This "happening" made me think about a few things. The Oprah episode. I don't know if you saw it, not everyone is tuning in to Oprah in the middle of the day. I don't usually do it, myself, but I saw a promo for this episode, and although I shouldn't have done it, I tuned in. It was the one where she interviewed a woman whose baby died after she left her in the car all day. I couldn't watch the whole show, I was crying so hard. I was crying because babies shouldn't die, but also because I knew that "there but for the grace of god..." As evidenced by my mistake today, it can happen so easily, the simplest, smallest oversight. Brought on by overwork, hectic lives, lack of sleep. Luckily for me and my family, my mistake did not lead to tragedy.

This "happening" also made me think about how I deal with my mistakes. As soon as I was sure everything was okay, I let it go and moved on to thinking about how I would keep it from happening again, and what I needed to do for my child now. This is yet another thing I have learned from having children. It is a necessary way of living when you have little people depending on you. There is no time for wallowing in self loathing or asking "what if". Our children need us to act quickly, forgive ourselves and move on.

So my son is okay, I have learned something, and we will all continue with our lives. I wonder, if my mistake had led to tragedy, could I ever forgive myself? There's that "what if".